It’s exactly what it says on the tin:
*Man walks into a bank* – “Is this a bank?”
*Woman in a clothes shop* – “Can I have this dress for free? It’s my birthday.”
*Man is in the bank again* – “What loans do you do?” We’re not that type of bank – “I’ll just have your cheapest loan then please.”
*Woman in stationary store* “My friend just stole the pen that I bought. Can I have another one for free?”
*Walks past a guide dog* “Is this your real job?”
*Person in pet shop* “I left my dog unattended, you owe me a new one”
*Woman in Supermarket* “What fruit do you have?” – We’ve sold out I’m afraid – “Four apples then please”
*Person in Greggs (other popular pastry stores are available)* “Give me a sausage roll” — You’ve had 70 sausage rolls in the past 20 minutes, you’re covered in vomit and you’ve just called the work experience girl a cunt. “No I haven’t! I want to speak to the manager” I am the manager
Several years later… *Trip Advisor* – “1 Star: just went in for a pasty, never met ruder staff in my life. Went to a rival bakery to spend my money”
*In a clothes shop* “Do you have any V-neck t-shirts but without the V?” – so, you want a crew neck or a polo or…? – “No, I would have asked for that if I wanted it. I want a V-neck t-shirt, but without the V”
*Man walks into a charity shop* “You should smile more, you’d look prettier”
*Woman in a museum* “I know the owner”
*Person walks into an antique shop* “I pay your wages”
*Man in a sex shop* “So, like… Are you studying, or what?”
*Woman walks into a launderette* “These are my kid’s clothes, so is it free?”
*In a supermarket* “Can I have this for half price? The atmosphere isn’t right in here.”
*Trip Advisor* “Went to Tesco and it was closed so I can only give it one star I’m afraid.”
*In a suit shop* “Excuse me, this suit is too suity.”
*Whilst at a self-service check out* “I’m never coming here again. Terrible service.”
*In a drained swimming pool* “Are you open?”
*In an estate agents* “I need a house with one bedroom”
*Buys house with one bedroom* “Where are my kids supposed to sleep?”
*In a travel agents* “Do you do holidays?”
*In a library* “Is this paper made out of paper? I’m allergic to paper”
*In fireworks warehouse* “OMG! your job must be so much fun!” – It’s just boxes
*In a pharmacy* “I can’t remember what it was called, but it was blue”
*To Father Christmas* “Is Ray here? How about Sally? You must be new…”
*Shaking fist at broken escalator* “I’ve been waiting here for hours.”
*In a Library* “Can you play good music?”
*Man to doctor* “I used to do this years ago. In a pub.”
*To a juggler* “Excuse me? Can you take a picture for us”
*Man on a bus* “I’m a vegan”
fin
IMG Credit: ~Pawsitive~Candie_N
What's Your Cheapest Shot? 
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