Hello. Welcome. If you, like a lot of people who are new to the fair city of Manchester, need tips and advice on what you should do during your visit then you have come to the right place. We’re only too happy to share our tips and knowledge on how to best spend your time.
With that in mind here are our top things to do when you are in the rainy city.
Go to a Tiki Bar And Shout “WOOOOOOOOO” When Someone Uses a Blowtorch
IT’S BLOODY FIRE AHHHHHHH
Go to Common and Say “This is just IKEA with a bar”
They’ll love it, honestly. – also, just wanted to use a picture of Chuck Norris.
Write a TripAdvisor Review About a Bar You’ve Never Been Into
Complain That The Courtyard is Full of Students
…and then look around and realise it’s surrounded by THE FUCKING STUDENT VILLAGE.
Complain That Canal Street is Full of “the gays”
Then go back to your cave and masturbate over your Nick Griffin/Nigel Farage poster.
Go to The Alchemist and Shout “WOOOOOOOOO” When Something Explodes
Go to Spinningfields and Complain That The Prices are “Just Like London”
Before realising they’re not and then going to the Printworks and starting a fight with a traffic cone.
Ask “Where’s Good to go?” at 5am in the Morning
And get upset for some reason when this is the only answer possible.
Sleep With a Bartender
“It’s something unpredictable, but in the end is right. I hope you had the time of your life.”
Hope this helps for some inspiration.
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main IMG: Per Gosche | flikr