The Best of TripAdvisor Part 2

TRIP ADVISOR. It’s the breeding ground for over-privaledged idiots who have no concept of how little their uneducated opinions matter. Following on from our previous piece: “The Best Worst Trip Advisor Reviews” we’ve revisited the shit stain of a website and grabbed some new reviews that are solely designed to let you know just how important these people are.




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Annddd that’s all you need to know.

N.B: Definitely about a Restaurant/Bar and not a female grooming salon.

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That feeling when your cocktail talks to you and is a bigger arsehole than you are.

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That is not a pun and you have had all pun-cracking privileges removed.

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When you say you’re a “Veteran of Hospitality” on a negative TripAdvisor review, you’re basically telling everyone that you touch cats in their special places.

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This guy’s palette is finely tuned and also very moral.

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Written at the start of a very long review.

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This review actually goes into detail about the room next door having sex. It’s not very enticing and she doesn’t give them any credit for their rhythm and stamina.

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… Has written a ‘Terrible’ review before this one.

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 4pounds 50 for 2 drinks is a fucking bargain.

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Going into a Caribbean Restaurant and ordering something that you don’t class as Caribbean and then complaining that it isn’t Caribbean is how the Cold War started.

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“Fuck you guys. No-offence to guys though.”

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I’m sure your high-quality restaurants missed your presence that night.

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The world literally thanks you for literally taking the time to literally do so.

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“Bad Attitude Parts 1 and 2” will be available in cinemas early 2017. Storyline fairly intuitive and you guess the theme of the plot yourself.

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I hate ordering T-Bone rubbish. Also, I WILL tell you exactly how to make these raw tomatoes and one mushroom taste great. Get a pen.


TripAdvisor drains the life from people. It should be avoided at all costs and if you ever feel the need to write a review on this whirling coagulated semen bucket of a website then please do have a few words with yourself first. If you still feel the need to infect the world with your words of utter T-Bone rubbish please mention if you are a veteran of the hospitality industry or how much money you spent at a different venue.


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