The Angry Internet Reactions to Bartenders.

There’s a ton of articles and things all over the internet from bartenders that are desperately trying to explain to people the aspects of their job. With every single article you will ALWAYS find people that seem to just want an internet fight because they assume they’re anonymous and no-one can ever hurt them.

Here’s a few ‘points’ that different people always make when ever they’ve read one of these: “Please be nice to me, I’m a human too” pieces. I’m probably not even making half of these responses up. I’ve added in the nice responses other bartenders write, just because the world needs niceness.

There are so many people that actually view bartenders in this way. It’s slightly heartbreaking but it does explain ISIS:

“Just Say Please and Thank You. It Doesn’t Cost Anything.”

1: “How about you fuck off?”

2: “You’re at the bottom of the food chain, just be happy someone let you have a meaningless job.”

3: “I completely agree. Manners cost nothing and make my day a little bit better.”

4: “Just serve your drinks and shut up. No-one asked for your opinion.”

“Stop Asking me For Surprises.”

1: “How about you fuck off?”

2: “Just be happy they’re asking you for anything. Peasant.”

3: “It does get annoying, not everyone likes the same things and we have to take allergies into account.”

4: “So many bartenders are getting ideas above their station now. Just do what the customer asks you to.”

If You’re on Your Phone, I’m Not Going to Serve You.”

1: “You’ll do as you’re told.”

2: “Some of us have more important things to do than to waste it talking to you.”

3: “It’s really annoying and so rude.”

4: “If bartenders ever understood that they are there to serve us, the world would be a better place.”

“This is a Proper Career.”

1: “Hahahaha. Fuck Off.”

2: “Only for uneducated dole dodgers who live with their parents.”

3: “I agree. I spend a lot of time at trainings and tastings and work more hours than most jobs. I’m constantly trying to further my knowledge.”

4: “Nah, you’re just a struggling actor.”

“I Will Serve You When I Can. Stop Clicking and Whistling at me.”

1: “Just serve me now?”

2: “How are we supposed to know this when you don’t tell us? I’ve been here for two minutes already.”

3: “People don’t seem to understand that they aren’t the first people there and there is a queue system.”

4: “I’m paying your wages, I’m more important than you. Serve me now.”

“Don’t Argue With us if We’ve Just Told You We’ve Stopped Serving.”

1: “Die.”

2: “I’ll argue all I want. I paid for my drinks.”

3: “Last orders is always the worst, people don’t like being told no.”

4: “You’re all just skinny jean wearing, beard growing fucking hipsters. I make more money in a week than you do in your lifetime.”


The internet is a mean and ironic place. Why can’t everyone just hold hands and be nice to each other?


IMG: Harald Groven


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