Things That Bartenders Say in Bars.

“We used to have that in our bar, ‘s shit.”

“I work at *insert bar here*.”

“I used to work here.”

“I used to really like it in here.”

“I fucking love Fernet Branca.”

“Fernet Branca is the devil’s urine.”

“You DON’T have that in?”

“How good’s your daiquiri?”

“Is the owner here still the same person…? I know them really well.”

“You’ll have to come to my bar, I’ll look after you there…”

“Got any hooch?”

“Did you just charge me full price?”

“Oh god yeah, I hate tiki…can I have a zombie?”


“I came up with a very similar cocktail once.”

“If I get the bartender a tequila, he wont charge me for any.”

“Ah, he charged me for all of them.”

“I’d love to work here.”

“I’d hate to work here.”

“Someone’s sprayed WD-40 or furniture polish on the toilet ledge. Fuckers.”

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